If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Randomize
