He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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