That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
