you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
