I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
try to milk me bitch
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