I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
