everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
