This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
