I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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