He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
