he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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