You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
