i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
