i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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