He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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