I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
