need another drink. this is the easiest way
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
