I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
i believe in u and ur pee
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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