i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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