If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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