I puked a lego.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
