Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
