So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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