I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize