i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
