Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
