I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
If I die, sorry about rent.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
