i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
