I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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