i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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