ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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