I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
I need help removing her.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Found your dick twin last night
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
