went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize