Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
