Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
