Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
