I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
