he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
