I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Randomize
