I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
