respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
