at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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