he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
