I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
