so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
