Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
