How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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