two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
