I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
