I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
